VSCodium suggestions

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Britney Lozza 2025-07-31 01:06:18 -04:00
parent 5c849fe803
commit 05fa551cd3
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data/genderSelection.txt Normal file
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=-=-= Gender Selection =-=-=
What is your gender?
1) Cis Man
2) Cis Woman
3) Trans Man
4) Trans Woman
5) Non Binary
6) Create your own gender

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data/intro.txt Normal file
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______ ___________ ___ _ _
| ___/ ___| ___| / _ \ | | | |
| |_ \ `--.| |_ / /_\ \ __| __ _____ _ __ | |_ _ _ _ __ ___ ___
| _| `--. | _| | _ |/ _` \ \ / / _ | '_ \| __| | | | '__/ _ / __|
| | /\__/ | | | | | | (_| |\ V | __| | | | |_| |_| | | | __\__ \
\_| \____/\_| \_| |_/\__,_| \_/ \___|_| |_|\__|\__,_|_| \___|___/

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Matthew Garrett runs up to you with a huge grin...
'Use this giant bag of cocaine to get them high! Cocaine is cruise control for cool.'
Who do you want to share this generous portion of COCAINE with?
1) Richard Stallman
2) Alexandre Oliva
3) Eric S. Raymond

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You take some cocaine out of the bag and put some of that fantastic powder onto a mirror. You setup a line for Richard, but he grabs the bag out of your hand.
'That line is for you, THIS one is for me!' he yells.
RMS shoves his head in the bag of cocaine and starts inhaling like Kirby from a Nintendo game.
What a fucking hog!

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You take some cocaine out of the bag and put some of that fantastic powder onto a mirror.
You setup a line for LXO, he rolls up a dollar bill and snorts the line.
'This is teh shit' he says.
For the next hour an a half... LXO rambles about Free Software while harassing the Libreboot project over its name.
'Bruh, the only true free computer is your mind maaaaaaan' he says.
LXO is tripping.

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You take some cocaine out of the bag and try to put some of that fantastic powder onto a mirror but ESR stops you.
"Let me show you a little trick! It's time for a software update!" he says.
ESR grabs you by the hand and brings you into the FSF HQ kitchen and starts going through the cupboards.
'Aha! Here it is!' he says.
'Baking soda! We're gonna turn that cocaine into crack!'
After the two of you make crack, he pulls out a pipe. He starts smoking the crack.
ESR IS FUCKED UP ON CRACK!
ESR is now paranoid, he is checking the room for surveillance equipment.

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Richard Stallman invites you to a Free Software party at the new HQ!
You barely make it past the wall of body odor as a bunch of 40 year old virgins are dressed in authentic vintage clothing and are sporting neckbeards.
Alexandre Oliva enters the room while rolling a tire full of nitrous oxide.
"We're having a laughing gas party!" he says.
What do you do?
1) Take a hit of nitrous.
2) Replace tire of nitrous with a tire of mustard gas.
3) Call the cops.
4) Suggest ketamine instead.

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You take a hit of nitrous oxide from the spare tire.
As soon as the gas hits your lungs, you feel a sudden and intense sensation of weightlessness, as if you're floating on a cloud of pure bliss.
The world around you becomes distorted, like a funhouse mirror reflection of reality.
The rush of nitrous oxide is like a tidal wave of pure pleasure, crashing over you with such force that it's almost impossible to resist.
It's a feeling that's hard to describe, but it's like being on top of the world, with nothing but the wind in your hair and the sun on your face.
Colors become more vivid, sounds more amplified, and time itself seems to slow down.
It's as if the very fabric of space-time has been warped in your favour, allowing you to experience the universe in a way that's both exhilarating and terrifying.
Alexandre walks over to you, still laughing like a lunatic.
'That wasn't nitrous oxide! It was aerosolized lysergic acid diethylamide!' he says while continuing to laugh.

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You decide that you've had enough of these people already. You carefully watch them take a few hits of the nitrous oxide.
They are behaving erratically, this isn't just laughing gas. It's something else.
Ain't you glad you didn't take a hit?
Alexandre Oliva calls everyone over to his laptop. Now is your chance to swap the tire with your surprise, so you sneak off to the tire.

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You attempt to switch the tires... You carefully remove the tire full of nitrous oxide... You carefully put the tire of mustard gas in its place......
but fail!
Zoë Kooyman confronts you, but you casually explain to her that you were actually getting rid of the tires.
She gives you a big hug and you walk off with both tires.
Fuck!

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You attempt to switch the tires... You carefully remove the tire full of nitrous oxide... You carefully put the tire of mustard gas in its place......
You succeed!
Alexandre Olivia starts taking hits from the tire. You distract everyone else by pointing out that a homeless person is trying to break into Zoë's car.
You go outside and discover that there actually is a homeless person, and he is trying to break into her car.

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Oh... It's just Richard Stallman.
He does kind of look like a homeless Santa Claus.
Well then...
You go back inside, Alexandre Oliva is dead. Zoë Kooyman inspects his body and she notices redness, signs of irritation around his neck, and blistering.
One less person in the way of your goals.

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You quietly slip away from the partygoers and make your way to a relatively quiet corner of the room, trying not to draw attention to yourself.
You quickly pull out your phone and dial 911, trying to speak as softly as possible so as not to alert anyone else to what you're doing.
As soon as you hang up the phone, the lights in the room begin to flicker and a loudspeaker announcement comes through the party's sound system:
GNU/LibertyWatch Alert Level: SEVERE.
'Law enforcement is en route. Please remain calm and follow instructions from the authorities.'
The music stops, and the partygoers begin to murmur amongst themselves, sensing that something is amiss.
Alexandre Oliva looks at you with a mixture of confusion and suspicion while he disposes of the tire, while Richard Stallman merely raises an eyebrow in curiosity. You're not sure what's going to happen next, but it's clear that the party has just taken a dramatic turn for the worse.")
The party is over.

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You suggest ketamine instead, and Alexandre Oliva's eyes light up with excitement.
'Ah, yes! Ketamine would be perfect for this party!' he exclaims, rummaging through his bag to find a vial of liquid.
'It'll give us all a whole new level of...freedom.'
The other party attendees start to murmur among themselves, some looking intrigued and others clearly apprehensive.
Richard Stallman, however, looks unconvinced.
'I'm not sure this is such a good idea,' he says, frowning. 'We don't want anyone getting hurt here.'
As Alexandre Oliva starts preparing the ketamine equipment, a loud, booming voice echoes through the party area.

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'Hey, what's going on here?' Eric S. Raymond asks, his eyes scanning the room with a mixture of curiosity and suspicion.
'You're just in time for the ketamine party!' Alexandre exclaims, holding up the vial of liquid.
ESR looks at you, then back at Alexandre, and raises an eyebrow.
'Ketamine? I thought this was a sex party' he says while looking disappointed.

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Matthew Garrett runs up to you excitedly
'Use this heroine needle to your advantage! It'll be funny as hell!' he says.
Who do you want to share this beautiful HEROINE with?
1) Richard Stallman
2) Alexandre Oliva
3) Eric S. Raymond

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You inject Richard Stallman in the arm with heroine.
He starts freaking out about being forced to use passwords.
He looks at the clock, and starts to rage about the source code not being available.
Holy shit! RMS is tripping balls!

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You inject Alexandre Oliva in the arm with heroine.
His eyes roll and he falls to the ground in pure ecstacy.
He is drooling.

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You inject Eric S. Raymond in the arm with heroine.
He starts to sweat profusely, and freaks out.
He starts ranting about an alleged 2nd amendment right to own nuclear weapons.
Holy shit!

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You decide to try and diffuse the tension by making a penis joke at Bryan Lunduke's expense.
'Hey, I've heard that men like you need to use a magnifying glass to find their own dicks,' you say with a smile.
Bryan Lunduke's face turns beet red with rage. 'How dare you!' he spits out. 'I'll have you know, I'm a respected member of the Trump Administration!'
He leans forward, his eyes blazing with anger. 'You're just trying to distract me from the real issue at hand - your own incompetence as a woke libtard!'
The air in the room seems to thicken with tension as Bryan Lunduke's face gets redder and redder.
You know, I've always wondered,' you continue, trying to keep from laughing, 'what kind of dildos your wife must use to finish herself off with after a sad session with you.'
Bryan Lunduke's expression doesn't change, but his eyes seem to flicker with anger. He takes a deep breath and tries to compose himself.
'Get out of my office!'

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You decide to try and flirt with Bryan Lunduke, hoping to catch him off guard. 'So, Bryan,' you say with a smile, 'I've heard that the best way to get ahead in this organization is to kiss up to the right people.'
Bryan Lunduke's expression doesn't change, but his eyes seem to flicker with interest. 'Ah, yes,' he says dryly. 'That's certainly true. But I'm afraid I'm not interested in someone so mentally ill - least of all someone as...'
The air in the room seems to vibrate with tension as Bryan Lunduke's gaze lingers on yours.
'Can you send nudes? My e-mail is bryan@lildick.com'
You leave the office.

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You stand before the nondescript door, labeled 'Bryan Lunduke, Director of Anti-DEI' in Comic Sans.
The air around you seems to thicken with unease as you reach out and turn the handle.
A faint whiff of stale cigarettes wafts out, mingling with the scent of yesterday's coffee.
'Ah, you must be the new volunteer,' he says, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
He leans back in his chair, steepling his fingers together in a gesture that's more about concealing his hands than showing any sign of interest.
'So, I hear you're here to discuss the new Trump mandated Anti-DEI department,' he says, a hint of venom creeping into his voice.
'Yes, well, because of that I wanted you to know that you're a mentally ill weirdo.'
'How big is it? Oh... nevermind'
1) Make a sexist joke at his expense
2) Flirt with him

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Bryan Lunduke walks up to you, slaps you on the ass and then proceeds to call you a mentally ill pedophile.
How will you respond?
1) Punch the nazi fuck right in the face!
2) Walk away without doing anything

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You swing your fist at the nazi but he dodges it.
'So much for the tolerant left' he says, while winking at you.
You notice he has a boner.
You leave in disgust.

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You swing your first and punch that nazi piece of shit in the face!
He falls to the floor and starts to cry like a little baby.
'So much for the tolerant left' he says while sniffling.
Bryan gets up and runs away back to his office.